As you contemplate what sentimental messages to write in the next father’s day card you purchase, I ask of you to consider doing the following: Celebrate Dads Beyond Fathers Day.
In todays social climate – and generally speaking of course – how often do we truly concern ourselves with fathers beyond the fleeting, half-hearted recognition of fatherhood on Father’s day? On topics of children and family, how often do we actively consider the perspectives, emotional investment and support of dads in those conversations? As a collective, do we even believe that men [in general] prioritize healthy, meaningful relationships with their children and are capable of experiencing strong emotional bonds with them? The temptation to collectively answer, “Of course!” will be great because the rational mind dictates we respond as such. However, our actual societal practices and general attitudes tell a very different story. One characterized by indifference and intolerance towards the experiences and concerns of fathers.
“When a father weeps in silence and no one is around to witness it, does he hurt any less?”
A key reason why fathers are not valued
Deeply engrained in our subconscious is the pervasive and socially accepted notion that men are not as inherently connected to their own children as mothers. The inference being that men are not as greatly impacted by the gain or loss of their sons and daughters and therefore are not as trustworthy with the well being of their children. Sadly, this is not a matter of opinion, but a cultural reality that is present consciously, subconsciously and undeniably apparent in our longstanding impassivity regarding the systemic disenfranchisement and displacement of fathers from their families. Reasons behind this cultural phenomenon – our persistent failings to recognize man’s paternal value beyond his wallet – is something we will explore in greater depth in an upcoming post. Stay tuned for that.
The aim of todays post, however, is to drive into darkness the cancerous one dimensional caricaturization of fathers by spotlighting the real life experiences of men who are also dads; experiences that include the struggles, triumphs, failures and lessons gleaned from fatherhood. Because in order for our society to once again truly appreciate the invaluable role of fathers, we first need to be open to recognizing the humanity in men. The first step in doing so is to take from their own words and pen their human experiences as fathers and men.
What is ‘Fathers Writes’?
Fathers Writes is a diary of sorts – a collection of short journal entries that chronicles the heartfelt and real accounts of fathers from all walks of life who have gone through (or are currently going through) broken relationships with their children. At the same time, Fathers Writes also features positive stories on the joy filled moments dads experience together with their sons and daughters. #DadsToo deserve to have their voices heard and stories told, which is why we want to give voice to all fathers who cry and love in silence.
“A fathers greatest gift is being there for his sons and daughters while raising them with compassion, strong values, and structure.”
By highlighting the challenges, toxic environments and the impact painful scenarios have on the quality of life, relationships and emotional health of fathers and their children, Fathers Writes strives to foster a greater understanding of what men who are committed to raising their children face when dealing with unfavorable circumstances such as uncooperative mothers, courts, and societal apathy.
How you can help to change the narratives
We are now calling on all dads to submit your stories of fatherhood (whether they are moments of joy or sorrow) in to us to be anonymously featured in this new ongoing series. In addition to being a great dad in real life, here is your opportunity to spread awareness of the joys and pains of fatherhood that are often unnoticed. You can submit as many entries as you’d like. Please keep each submission to 600 words or less. Click to submit.
To the readers of these journal entries: Your thoughts, advice, suggestions, support and just simple fellowship in the comment section is highly encouraged. We always want to hear your thoughts. Let’s celebrate fathers together.
And lastly, share this post with as many great dads as you know! Tweet it, Instagram it, FaceBook it, share the link, ect. This can be your gift to them. The more dads that participate in this project, the better. As tiny as this effort may seem, this is one way in which great dads can help to change existing narratives about fatherhood outside of their immediate circle. And that can be their gift to the world.
#DadsMatterToo #Fatherhood #FathersDay #FathersMatter #HappyFathersDay #FathersWrites #OMB
“Your value extends well beyond your ability to skeet X and Y chromosomes by the millions”